I hope you see diamonds when you look at me,
When you picture your best life, I hope it’s next to me.
I’m not perfect, my past is a bit tainted
I hope you see through the demons the more we get acquainted
What ever you desire I got it I promise,
Even if the truth ain’t pretty
If you’re ever question something I’ll always be honest
I want you to know all my flaws if you decide to stick with me..
The last man I laid with was an idiot.
The one before him was even worst, and I still let him hit
Let’s not forget about the one who left me with a dead kid
I don’t think anyone can hurt me worst than he did.
You might ask why I would ever choose men who never chose me
Why would I do things for them that they could use to expose me
The truth is my love, I used to loathe me
But even at my lowest, I never gave them the whole me.
Sure I let them in my body but never in my soul
They helped passed the time, they were acting, they played a role
I doubted your existence for a while, but I’m done doubting
I had to learn to accept my solitude, so now I’m done scouting
All that bed hopping left me empty, so I quit bouncing
I’m alone but I’m never lonely
My indiscretions run deep but they don’t own me
I knew I had to love all of me in order for you to want me
My confidence is deadly…
Because I know thats what you’re expecting
You are the one who sees beauty in my baggage,
You aren’t afraid to help me unpack it
You see my talents, you see my come up, you understand my message
I don’t know if I know you yet but I’m speaking us into existence.
You will accept my ugly interior, and your love will be consistent
A love that helps me grow, and a love without conditions
Because after all I’ve been through you will know thats what I need now
A painless love that wont make my heart bleed out
You know days won’t be perfect, and when I’m spiraling you wont leave out
If I met you now or when I’m 55..
I know 10 years of remission couldn’t make me feel more alive.
I know you won’t distract me from my purpose
I know all this waiting will be worth it
For a love thats imperfectly perfect
No one will stand in my way because the universe knows I deserve it
Everything will be in line
I am all yours, and ready for you to be mine
I am not rushing because you will be here at the perfect time…
I had to accept these years in the dark in order to appreciate your light
Nothing about you will be questioned because destiny is always right
I will love you without fear
All will stop spinning when you’re near..
I guess I’ll see you when you get here…